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Episode 2

19 The cell. Quillom: So, where's this dog of yours got to, then? A laser beam starts cutting a hole in the wall from the outside. Romana: K9? That'll be him now. Quillom: Fierce little fellow, is he? Romana: His bark's worse than his bite. Quillom: Well, in that case, I wouldn't fancy a chat with him on a dark night. Romana: Oh, his conversation is absolutely charming - such a bon raconteur. Look - he's nearly through. The guard opens the door, admitting Pygmalion (aka the Master), dressed in the uniform of a high-ranking Omarian officer. Pygmalion: I want the girl, Romana. The guard grabs Romana and drags her over to Pygmalion, who takes her strongly by the wrist. Romana: Where are you taking me? Pygmalion: Somewhere quiet. I think you and I should have a little talk. Pygmalion drags Romana away, exchanging glances with Quillom. We follow them down the corridor. We hear the crunch as K9 breaks through the wall. Then Quillom shouts "Come on" and the prisoners escape. The guard rushes into the cell, but too late. He raises the alarm. Pygmalion: Just keep walking, Romana. We're going out the front gate. Romana: Who are you? 20 We see the prisoners running away, led by Quillom and K9. The stragglers are shot. The frontrunners make it out through a breach in the fence (made by K9 earlier), but are shot. Quillom and K9 manage to get a few streets away before being cornered. K9 and the pursuing soldiers start firing at each other, while Quillom tries to escape, but he is shot in the back. K9 fails to hold off his assailants and his head is shot off. The soldiers leave them for dead. 21 The front gate. Romana and Pygmalion are leaving. Sentry: Have a good night, Sir. Pygmalion: Thank you, Corporal. The sentry raises the barrier. Pygmalion and Romana leave. Romana: Let me guess - you're not really an Omarian officer; you just like the uniform. Pygmalion: It does rather suit me, doesn't it? Romana: A girl always likes a man in uniform, especially if he's just helped her escape. Pygmalion: And what makes you think you've escaped? Romana: Feminine intuition. Pygmalion: And what else does your feminine intuition tell you? Romana: That the Rain in Spain falls Mainly on the Plain. Pygmalion: By George, I think she's got it. Romana: So, where were we thinking of going, now that you've passed yourself off as a colonel at the Omarians' ball. Pygmalion: Well, I was thinking of going back to my shop for a quiet chat, and maybe a drink or two, unless you'd rather go somewhere else. Romana: Actually, I know this sounds pathetic, but I'd really like to find my dog. I do hope he hasn't gotten into any mischief with that nice Mr Quillom. Pygmalion: I see your point. We'd better be careful, though. There are lots of soldiers about. Romana: But you're a colonel, silly. Pygmalion: Oh, so I am. 22 The scene of K9's last stand. A squad of men commanded by a lieutenant is clearing up the mess, including Quillom's body. They are loading the bodies onto a truck, and are about to add the pieces of K9, when Pygmalion and Romana arrive. Pygmalion (to Romana): Leave this to me. (approaching the lieutenant): Excuse me, lieutenant, but what are you doing with that robotic dog? Lieutenant: My orders are to clear up the debris, Sir. Pygmalion: Can't you see that dog's not rubbish. It could contain useful technology. Give it over to me at once. Lieutenant: I have my orders, Sir. Pygmalion (giving him a long, hard, hypnotic stare): Indeed you do, lieutenant, my orders. Lieutenant (blinking): Oh, certainly, Sir. By the way, Sir, apparently there's one prisoner still unaccounted for - a girl. Pygmalion: Well, I certainly haven't seen her. (to Romana): Have you seen her? Romana: Can't say I have. Pygmalion (giving K9's head to Romana, and picking up his body): Let's be on our way back to the laboratory, then. Come along. 23 Pygmalion Robotics. The shop used to be a terraced house - the business premises are the downstairs front room. At the back there is a kitchen; upstairs, a bedroom and a sitting room. They enter by the back door, which leads into the kitchen and set down the bits of K9. Romana: So this is home? Pygmalion: In a manner of speaking. The sitting room's upstairs. I suggest you make yourself comfortable while I mix some drinks. Then we can talk in comfort. Romana: Sounds good - I could really use a drink. We follow Romana upstairs. Hung on the wall, there are the charred remains of what was clearly a beautiful female android. The unblasted bits of its complexion have the appearance and colour of a fresh bar of Body Shop peach soap (a sort of shiny orangey red). On the landing, there is a grandfather clock. Our attention is not specifically drawn to these objects, but they are nonetheless conspicuous. Romana enters the sitting room, whose door is open, and sits down on the sofa. 24 Pygmalion enters with a drink in each hand. He gives Romana a small but ornate purple goblet containing a pink liquid which is giving off a lot of vapour. He has a straight half-pint glass with some nasty green stuff in it, and silly cocktailly adornments. Pygmalion: Is Argolian Jacynthus acceptable? It's my last drop. Romana: Just what the doctor ordered. How did you guess? Pygmalion: You looked the type. A toast? Romana (raising the goblet): To Gallifrey. Pygmalion (touching glasses): Not if I can help it. Romana: E-space - such a charming little universe. Pygmalion: I think we could even get away with calling it 'bijou'. Romana: The perfect place for two exiled Time Lords to go to ground. Mmm, this is wonderful. Pygmalion: I won't ask if you don't either. Romana: I wouldn't answer if you did. Pygmalion: And I really would prefer if you didn't ask how I know you when you don't know me. Romana: What would you prefer me to ask? Pygmalion: Let's just concentrate on the task in hand. Helox. The Omarians. Romana: I think there's more going on here than just an attempt to hijack passing time machines. Otherwise why would you ask me to come here? Where did the Omarians get a Time Scanner, by the way? It's not the sort of thing you generally pick up at the village jumble sale. Pygmalion: You're right. There is more going on here than a bunch of incompetents fiddling with a device beyond their comprehension. No, Helox, Helox the insignificant, Helox the backwater, this planet Helox guards the only known piece of possibly the most potent material any universe has ever known. Heloxite - that is what the Omarians seek; and you and I are all that stands in their way. You and I, Romana; it falls to us to do it. There is no-one else. 25 Senior Intelligence Officer Trettan's Office, Omarian Base. Trettan is a woman in the femme fatale mould. She is in discussion with the Commander (the one we saw earlier) and Slyke. Neither is enjoying it much. Trettan: Commander, Mr Slyke has just been telling me of a number of recent and disturbing disappearances. I was wondering if you could shed some light on the matter. Commander: Disappearances, Ma'am? Which do you mean? Trettan: Spoilt for choice, eh? Well, let's start with the Heloxite. That disappeared from the City Museum, didn't it? You'd have thought it might have been better guarded. Commander: I can't work miracles, Ma'am. The Heloxite was stolen from the Museum just before we landed in force. Only the intelligence detachments were in place. Mr Slyke was here, for instance. Trettan: Yes, Slyke, tell me about the Heloxite. Slyke: Well, Ma'am, the last known position of the Heloxite was, as you know, in the Museum. The men who were guarding it remember nothing. Trettan: I'm not asking you to tell me things I already know, Slyke. Your job is to make sure I already know everything everyone else tells me - like what does the Heloxite look like? what exactly does it do? who took it? why haven't we found it yet? Slyke: The Heloxite, Ma'am, is currently in the form of a drinking goblet. It was on display in the Museum with the other relics of the Ancient Royal House of Helox. Its properties have not been established fully, although all sources would seem to concur that Heloxite absorbs any nearby high energy radiation, rendering atomic and laser weapons redundant. Trettan: And no advanced weapons technology means little advanced technology of any sort. Right, Slyke? Slyke: Indeed so, Ma'am, despite the fact that the Heloxians have long since forgotten how to deploy Heloxite militarily. That's why the army met no resistance of substance when they finally arrived here, two days later than planned. Commander: We arrived in the Helox system exactly on schedule, Mr Slyke. Slyke: Yes, you certainly did. Then you loafed about, orbiting Helox Delta, broadcasting your imminent arrival to anyone with a telescope and a brain. Is it any wonder, then, that the Heloxite was stolen? And your house-to-house search didn't exactly turn up anything of consequence, did it? Commander: I'm sure, Mr Slyke, that given useful intelligence, we will recover the Heloxite. As for the delay at Helox Delta, that was not of my making. I received new orders from High Command to hold off until a special mission to Nostos had been completed. Slyke: So the rug was pulled from under my operation by some bureaucratic fool's sightseeing trip to an uninhabited planet of no consequence? Trettan: Be careful who you call a bureaucratic fool, Slyke. It was my decision to make a raid on Nostos, which, as it happens, was inhabited. It was inhabited by a robot and a Time Scanner - which reminds me, Commander, we were talking about disappearances. A time capsule appeared and then disappeared. Coincidentally, the two men in Time Scanner Control died a very curious death, and the Incredible Shrinking Man, if it was a man, disappeared also. Have you any progress to report? Commander: The investigation of both events is proceeding, Ma'am, although we've had very few leads. The man who was on guard outside the tower remembers nothing. Trettan: How unfortunate. I do hope you find them. I would so much like to meet whoever shrank those men - it is a talent of which I am envious. 26 The kitchen, Pygmalion Robotics. It is now just light outside. Romana is wearing a silk dressing gown and her hair is wrapped in a towel. She is frying two eggs in a frying pan. Romana (calling to Pygmalion in the shop): How's K9? Pygmalion (dressed in his usual black, appearing from the shop carrying a strange-looking tool): Better than ever, or he will be when he's recharged. How's breakfast? Romana: Just coming. Tell me something. Pygmalion: Mmmm? Romana: What exactly does Heloxite do? Does it just absorb high energy radiation? Pygmalion: It does rather more than that, my dear. You wouldn't expect all that energy just to vanish. Romana: So what does it come out as? Pygmalion: Artron energy. Romana: You mean Heloxite works like the Eye of Harmony? Pygmalion: Yes, Rassilon's great feat of engineering, the taming of the black hole - all that in a lump of metal the Heloxians dug out of the ground over a thousand years ago. Fortunately, they never discovered all its properties, but if even a tenth of the legends about the Great Kings of Helox are true, the Heloxite has formidable powers. Romana: I can see why we don't want the Omarians to get hold of it. Quite apart from powering time machines, I don't like the thought of Omarians running about the universe with the mental facility that artron energy gives. But what I don't understand is why they haven't found it yet? They've been on Helox long enough. Pygmalion: Because I found it first. Romana: And where have you hidden it? Pygmalion (indicating the purple goblet, now in the sink): In the washing up. Romana: You crafty old devil. 27 Senior Intelligence Officer Trettan's Office. The Commander knocks and enters, accompanied by Slyke and a doctor (Dreel). Trettan: There had better be a good reason why you are interrupting me, Commander. Slyke: Yes, what's all this about. Commander: I believe that you, Ma'am, and you, Mr Slyke, will be very much interested to hear what Medical Officer Dreel has to report. Trettan: Very well, you have my attention. Dreel: An entire patrol of soldiers was found unconscious in sector 17, Ma'am. They arrived in the medical unit an hour ago. All but one of them have regained consciousness. Trettan: And I suppose they remember nothing? Dreel: On the contrary, Ma'am, they remember being attacked by a robotic dog. Trettan: And the other man? Dreel: I'm afraid he's dead, Ma'am. Broken neck. Struck from behind, poor chap. Slyke: Indeed. Where exactly did you say the patrol was attacked, Doctor? Dreel: Sector 17, Sir, just outside Pygmalion Robotics in Tanner Street. Slyke: That's where the girl was picked up - the one who escaped. Commander: Odd place, that - at least the search detail thought so. Odd to find robots at all on this wretched planet. Trettan (penny-dropping expression): Robots! Gentlemen, I think it's time you paid this place a visit. 28 The kitchen, Pygmalion Robotics. Romana has got clothes on. Romana: You realise they're bound to be on to us by now. We can't stay here. Pygmalion: Where do you suggest we go? Romana: If it wasn't for the Time Scanner, I'd head for the Tardis and just get out. Pygmalion: If it wasn't for the Time Scanner, I'd have scarpered with the Heloxite long ago. That's why you're here. Romana: What difference do I make? Pygmalion: You make all the difference - once I've destroyed the Time Scanner, you can slip off with the Heloxite. Romana: Assuming, for the moment, that you can evade Omarian security yet again, how will I know when the Time Scanner is out of action? Pygmalion: I'll be using the auto-destruct facility - I don't want to leave any trace of the technology - there'll be a ten second delay and then - well, you'll hear it when it happens. Romana: You're not going to get very far in ten seconds. Pygmalion: Oh, don't you worry about me, Romana - people have made less plausible escapes. We hear an unsubtle clamour as soldiers arrive by jeep outside and batter at the front door. Romana: Is that the patter of tiny feet? Pygmalion: Yes - it's jolly decent of them to give me a lift, what? I suggest you hide in the grandfather clock and then make for your Tardis when this lot have gone. Romana: Right. Fine. Good luck. Romana heads for the stairs. Pygmalion (handing her the Tissue Compression Eliminator): Oh, and take this - you might need it. Romana exits. 29 The alley round to the back of Pygmalion Robotics. Pygmalion slips quietly out the door, which opens inwards. There is a guard posted on the other side of the door from that on which it opens. He stands with his back to the wall, staring straight ahead, and consequently fails to notice Pygmalion as he slinks round the corner. He taps the protruding shoulder of the guard standing with his back to the shop by the alleyway. Pygmalion (tapping shoulder): Come along, then, I can't stand here all day. A large number of silent guards point their guns at him. Slyke is in charge. Slyke: Don't worry, Pygmalion, old chum. Before too long, you won't be able to stand at all. 30 Romana emerges from the grandfather clock with a knowing smile. K9 is standing on the landing. Romana: Time to go, K9. K9: Yes, Mistress. She picks him up and carries him downstairs to the kitchen, where she places him on the floor, facing the doorway. Quietly, she opens the door and hides behind it. Then she clears her throat. The guard swings round into the doorway and is stunned by K9. K9 glides out the door, and Romana moves to follow, but is interrupted by the sound of a throat being cleared behind her. She whirls round to see Trettan, holding a gun. Trettan: Well, well, well. How nice to see you again, Romana. Romana shrugs. Trettan: Order your dog to come back in here. Romana: K9... K9 (returning): Mistress? Trettan blasts K9. Trettan: Now, Romana, the Heloxite. Romana: The Heloxite? Trettan: The Heloxite. Where is it? Romana: Search me. Trettan: All in good time. Romana: I doubt you'll find it. Pygmalion hid it. Trettan: Your friend? How churlish of him! I rather hope for your sake that we do find it. 31 In the interrogation room. Pygmalion is strapped into the lie detector. Slyke: The Heloxite. Where is it? Pygmalion: Search me. Slyke: I already have. Pygmalion: I doubt you'll find it. Romana hid it. Slyke: Where did she hide it? Pygmalion: It would hardly have been clever of her to tell me. Romana's very clever. Slyke: I think you're lying. Pygmalion: I think your lie detector is entirely trustworthy. Slyke: We're wasting time... Soldier! A very large soldier clobbers Pygmalion a few times. Slyke: So, have you seen reason? Pygmalion: Not recently. Slyke: Why shouldn't I just have you killed? Pygmalion: Because I know where the Heloxite is? Slyke: So you do know where the Heloxite is. Pygmalion: No, but you won't have me killed because you think I'm lying. I've always been such an unconvincing teller of the truth. Slyke (into a telephone): Get Dreel up here with the lysanin - he's being awkward. Pygmalion: So you have decided to kill me. Slyke: I doubt it will kill you before you've told me what I want to know. Pymalion: Lysanin may cure my reticence, but not my ignorance. We hear people approaching. Slyke: We can but wait and see. It won't take long now. Enter Trettan with Romana and a squad of soldiers. Dreel is tagging behind. Slyke: Good morning, ma'am. Dr Dreel was about to apply the lysanin. Trettan: There's no reason for such crudeness, Slyke. Pygmalion: I quite agree, ma'am. Honestly, Slyke, I expected better. Trettan: Of Slyke, Pygmalion? You're a fool. Romana: Yes, Pygmalion, you're a fool. Pygmalion: I'd be a fool to deny it. Slyke: I may be a fool, but I think we should concentrate on the Heloxite. Pygmalion: I wouldn't if I were you - you never know what it might do. Trettan: Look, Pygmalion, it's very simple. Either you tell us where the Heloxite is, or we kill the girl. Pygmalion: That's the choice? Trettan: That's the choice. Pygmalion: Kill the girl. On to Episode 3

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